Three Taverns Church

3 Weeks To Live

2 Comments

There is a story in the book I’m reading about a woman with 3 weeks to live. The details of her story are incidental to this post, because this post is really about my reaction to the story. As I read along I imagined how I would feel if I had 3 weeks left to live. Ponder this question for a moment, and I’ll bet at least one of the following thoughts crosses your mind:

  • Sadness at leaving this life, and your family and friends, behind
  • Fear of the unknown afterlife
  • Joy at the thought of meeting your Maker
  • Concern about how your loved ones would manage without you
  • Fear of the pain involved in the physical process of dying

As I considered my own feelings with regard to this story I admit that all these thoughts crossed my mind. However, the strongest thing I felt by far was disappointment: “That’s it? That’s all this life has been? Thirty four years old, and I’ve got what to show for my time here? What a waste.”

There is so much that is wrong with those thoughts. There is so much pain wrapped up in my words:

  • A selfish, narcissistic view that the world ought to serve my desire for meaning
  • A heart that refuses to be thankful for the wonderful family God has given me
  • Inflated and unrealistic expectations that my life should have some ‘grand purpose’
  • A strange self-loathing that on the one hand refuses to accept the blessings already in my life because of the belief that I’m not worthy of them, while on the other hand demands a privileged status among men
  • A denial of reality and God’s purpose for my life
  • The twisted, egotistical belief that I can tell the Alpha and the Omega how my life should be
  • The continual, striving urge to always do, rather than simply be

Last night my mentor reminded me that Moses spent forty years tending sheep before he was called to rescue Israel. Do you think Moses ever look around at his life and wondered, “Is this it?”

2 thoughts on “3 Weeks To Live

  1. Moses was in the witness protection program 🙂 !!

    He was probably SHOCKED that God called him to a “big job” when he was 80 years old!

  2. I wonder how you would answer this question now.

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